Here is a quote from one of my favourite weekly blogs, the sex and fantasy football mailbag from KSK. It is written by a guy called Matt Ufford who is by his own words on his twitter bio "SB Nation talking head, writer, Marine veteran, dog owner, occasional CrossFitter. Will bark like a seal for good whiskey." Sounds like a pretty stand up guy to me, and judging by his written work you'd most likely agree.
Anyways, here is a quote from his answer all blog. Considering my recent circumstances, it rings a bell for me. He's not far wrong, and I must be fairly accurate for the road to recovery.
MY SIGNIFICANT BROKE UP WITH ME. I’M DEVASTATED. WHAT DO I DO?
Go ahead and feel sorry for yourself for a little while. Take two to
four weeks to drink more than you should and listen to every sad song
that you own. Break out photos of her for masturbation sessions that end
in tears instead of orgasm. Be a miserable bore to your friends, who
want to support you and hang out with you, but not if you’re just going
to mope all night.
There. You got to wallow in your misery. Now it’s time to move on with your life. Let’s go to some numbered steps.
1. Realise that you shouldn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t love you.
“But what about all the hot sex and funny banter we had?” you ask.
SHE STOPPED ENJOYING IT. SHE DOES NOT WANT YOU. It’s stupid and selfish
to want to be with someone who doesn’t want you.
2. Break off all contact.
Don’t do that “let’s be friends” bullshit. Your ex-girlfriend wants
to be your friend for two reasons: (1) so she can continue to receive
attention from you, and (2) so she doesn’t have to feel so bad about
rejecting you. Fuck that noise, let her feel bad. If she’s keeping you
on the emotional hook by remaining in contact with you, ask her to stop
because you want to focus on moving on with your life. From then on out,
no contact. I SAID NO CONTACT. Block her on Gchat. Hide her Facebook
timeline from your feed. No email, no texting, no anything. Pretend
she’s dead. So sad she died, right? Oh well, better get a move on with
your life.
3. Begin self-improvement.
Don’t worry about dating or rebound sex. (If you’re comfortable with
it, go right ahead, but understand that re-entering the dating world can
be a depressing experience after the emotional/sexual cocoon of a
relationship.) Take your sadness and anger and your newfound free time
and funnel it towards self-improvement. Start a new workout regimen.
Sign up for cooking or bartending or wine-tasting classes. Throw
yourself into your job. Volunteer for a children’s program or animal
shelter. Out of the pyre of your failed relationship will emerge a
stronger, more knowledgeable, and more caring person with new circles of
friends from your new activities. YOU ARE A MAGNIFICENT PHOENIX.
In time, the more fit and more interesting person you become will
also be naturally more confident, and you’ll end up dating women who are
better looking and smarter than the stupid bitch who broke up with you
in the first place.
Who Am I?
- Tarannau57
- Daniel Lewis. Ordinary name, not such an ordinary bloke. I'm from Llanelli, and I've lived in Bath, Cardiff and have now settled in Devon and soon to be Somerset. I graduated with an honours degree in Accounting and Finance from Aberystwyth University. I played 3 years for Tarannau Aberystwyth American Football Team and now play for Somerset Wyverns (#57 and now #27). I am the defensive coordinator for Exeter Demons. I enjoy my life to the best of my ability, through family, friends and sport. I'm one of those cases of don't judge a book by its cover. I love to hit and do all the macho things you can dream of, but I'm also a domesticated professional, who loves to cook and read books. I'm a bit of a strange one, from my sense of humour to the title of this blog, as one of the rare few linebackers that can count.
